I attended a training yesterday that wasn’t really a training, actually. It was a drama troupe that put on a great production surrounding many issues we all face – whether it be personally or professionally. It was a work event, so a lot of the content fit the workplace – such as diversity and inclusion, sexual harassment and communication.
I read once that most work challenges are because of people. People are messy. We all are. We all come from our own place and see the world and others from our own perspective. Because we don’t always know what’s someone has been through or where they are from, it is difficult to assume what their perspective is and even more difficult to understand it without the background information.
I am writing about this because the exercise we did at the end of the production really impacted me. They had us all write a short “I am From” poem. In highs school I remember writing a similar poem, which was called “This is me. I am.” I loved that poem, too. Why? Because they help me put into words my own story and realize where I am at in my journey. Do I still have guilt associated with some things? What has impacted me so profoundly that it makes the poem? If you dig deep, even your own eyes are opened by the content.
I dug deep, because that is usually what I do. I could’ve kept it very surface level but it wouldn’t have been authentic. I knew that if I had to share it, tears were going to flow, but I decided not to hold back, even though I am newer employee and not everyone knows me very well at all yet.
So, here is my current I am From:
- I am from God, the mile wide city (Denver, Iowa), middle child, middle class, self-employed family, shamrock baby
- I am from the end of the alphabet and being last in line
- I am from an eating disorder starting in 3rd grade that never really goes away, even if outwardly I am controlling it
- I am from family and authentic relationships that are trusting and close and make me laugh until my stomach hurts
- I am from having my own baby way before I was ready in the mile high city
- I am from a 10+ year roller coaster of pain that led to a divorce that my deep rooted faith and values never wanted to allow me to have
- I am from guilt for my kids’ lives being a single mom, living in a run-down duplex
- I am from a whole lot of faith, hope for the future and full of grace for others
- I am from trying to please others too much sometimes
- I am from fairy tale visions of romantic comedies and being swept off my feet
- I am from Hawkeye Heaven and shop til you drop
- I am from jumping to conclusions like a boss
- I am from pizza and diet coke for every meal
- I am from dreams, goals, determination and hard work to accomplish what I seek to achieve
- I am from stubbornness and impatience of wanting to know everything…and taking control whenever I can
- I am from not knowing the answer when it comes to parenting and just trying to do the best I can every day
- I am from my imperfections, my experiences, my tendencies…and always always always my children’s hearts
What is your I am From? Understanding where others come from is such a big step in tackling the biggest distance that usually exists between two people: misunderstanding. The most effective communicators meet someone where they are and where they come from, not the other way around. Share your story with others. You never know who’s life you might touch.
This post is actually three years old. But, it still provides some valuable lessons from the happenings of a 10-year-old.
I got a call from my daughter’s school nurse last week. My mind went to sore throat, upset stomach – all the bugs that go around this time of the year. Instead, I heard that she fell off the high bar at recess. “And we think she broke her right arm.” Oh boy.
Here were the stats at the end of the day:
- 4 hours waiting
- 3 broken bones
- 2 casts (one on each arm)
- 1 scratched up face
And … 10 lessons learned from my 10-year-old over the last week. Even though each one is pretty simple, you might benefit from the refreshers both personally and professionally. I know I did.
She was wearing a smile in every picture I took of her. The doctor said she was one tough cookie. Sometimes the ability to keep smiling is very difficult. But when we smile, we can make someone’s day without even knowing it and it makes staying positive much easier.
Her Halloween costume would no longer work with the casts. So, she decided to let her injury work in her favor and opted to be an “injured person” instead. When Plan A doesn’t work, move quickly to the next solution and you might find it better than your original plan.
- A lesson that doesn’t kill you is a lesson learned.
When I pointed this out, I knew I had officially become my mother. But it’s so true. I was at a marketing conference a few years ago and one of the speakers said he would frequently tell his team that “no one is going to die” if they didn’t do something exactly right. As long as you are continually learning and then adjusting, you will get it right.
- Don’t be a show-off.
Speaks for itself. Don’t do it. Ever.
- Let rumors roll off your back.
Her biggest concern was rumors would spread about the accident. What if someone said she did it on purpose? What if someone said she got pushed off? As I listened to the simplicity of her concerns, I thought about how easy it is to get wrapped up in the worry of what others think, no matter how big/small/positive/negative/neutral it is.
- Allow others to help you.
I have become very good at getting just about any shirt or coat over two arm casts. There are other things she can still do on her own. Recognize where you need help and ask for it. It is ok!
- Take a month off from busy-ness.
You can’t really play sports or practice the clarinet with two arm casts. So, she gets a month off from the normal, busy weekly schedule. We are all enjoying this break! Sometimes taking time to slow down and smell the roses is absolutely necessary.
- Always sport your flair.
The best part about two casts? Picking out two different colors! She opted for neon green and rainbow tie-dye. What color is your flair? Make sure you sport it as much as possible.
- Do not use casts – or any other item for that matter – to harm others.
It has been very tempting for her to use her casts as weapons on her five-year-old brother. But we learned in kindergarten that it’s not nice to hit others. That’s still true.
- Being famous isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
After her first day back at school, I asked her if she got a lot of attention and was tired of telling the same story over and over again. She rolled her eyes and said, “Yes. I definitely never want to be famous.” After hitting it big, you might long to be just an ordinary person after all. (Casts might come in handy for the paparazzi, though!) Just kidding.
Do you remember THESE AMAZING 80s movies? My sister and I were reminiscing the other day about movies from our childhood – yes – we are children of the 80s baby! The movies on this list might’ve not been the most popular, but they are the ones we remember with a smile.
- White Water Summer (1987)
- The Legend of Billie Jean (1985)
- American Anthem (1986)
- Moving Violations (1985)
- The Pirate Movie (1982)
- Babes in Toyland…the one with Drew Barrymore (1986)
- Oh God! Book II (1980)
- Lucas (1986)
- Heathers (1988)
- Shag The Movie (1989)
What would you add to this list? I’d love to hear!